When is relationship a relationship ?

When is relationship a relationship ?

Kind of a hard question, isn’t it? I think this is the most difficult thing to call hahaha..

Have you ever in this kind of situation?

You (assume you are a woman) are seeing one guy for some period of time, you are dating and see each other regularly. But however if anyone refers to you if you as his girlfriend, the colour drains from his face suddenly as he always say that you guys are going out properly but he is not ready yet to be in relationship, he wasn’t there yet, he was not even so sure to be in a serious relationship, with you, or with anyone else (whom even prettier of whatsoever than you).

I (yes, Me) slightly want to hit my head even my body to the wall or table right know – as I really really really know how easy to get into that kind of situation – and how it feels to be in that kind of situation. Yes, I do. And in my personal opinion, I don’t know if you guys have other ideas for this kind of situation, we must have to define and make the time limit, how long you wanna be in that situation. 8 weeks? 6 months? A year? It’s depends on how long you can stand of it. For me, 6 months will be more than enough. My reasoning is if someone doesn’t that strongly enough for you after certain period of time (with intense communication, dating, seeing each other), then they are never ever ever ever ever be strongly feel for me at all, and they don’t deserve me to spent time and energy for them neither. And one simply thing, He is just not that into you.

Because the thing is, men perhaps can have tons of excuse to not to be into serious relationship, name it, “Scared of commitment”, “I am not ready yet.” , “I have no string to be attached to her.”, “I just need more time to ensure she is the right person to me marry.”, “we are just having fun.”. “ Not ready yet to be committed to someone.”, etc. etc. etc. That’s bullshit. Totally bullshit. Because I believe that when someone meets with the right person, they can propose for a serious relationship or even for a marriage, quick enough. Yes, quick enough.

Be into serious relationship doesn’t mean you MUST marry her quickly, correct me if I am wrong, guys~. It means that being into more serious relationship, I mean, you can call each other as a couple, will give you more space and chance to get to know each other deeper. With casual relationship, there are always border and limit what- which- what – which things you gonna share to your partner.

Some guy say, “What is different?? When you have casual relationship and then you guys break up. With, you are in serious relationship and then you guys got break up as well. Both ended by broken heart and same disappointment, I must say.”

In my personal opinion, it still different bro~ *LOL*

How can you break up the relationship if the relationship itself NEVER been started?

- N e e -

Be kind anyway

People says that a best friend is whom talking bad in front your face instead of telling you the nice flowery words. In some point, I agreed.

But, do you agree that whom hurt us the most is the closest one?

Especially when they said something rude to us, just because they don’t agree with our thought or what we do. Without any intention, they just said it frankly… and sometimes… being rude. 

Somehow.

I don’t say that friendship is meaningless, but in some point, we have to manage our words depend on the situation. When we feel that we know our best friend so well, we tend to say whatever we want without thinking if our statement will hurt them. 

But, people change.  And somehow, they don’t / refuse to realize our changes, especially of our thought, our expectation, our life, etc. They still think that we are same as before. And we don’t have enough time to explain every single thought to them anyway.

People tends to speculate if they don’t know what’s going on in our life. When they think they know, they judge. When finally they know, they just hate. And then being rude. Or try to change us to what they want us to be.

Maybe I reached my point of limit where I am tired to accept what they said to me. In the end, I let them think what they wants. I have no energy to explain who I am to people who keep committed to misunderstanding me. 

Be kind anyway... 

We ALWAYS know what we have. We just never think we’d lose it.

Why do we have to take for granted for everything that deserve our gratitude the most, for people, love, and possession ? For almost of the time, we just realized after the person, the things, and the moment has passed. We tend to assume wherever we need it/them, they will always be there.

Most of the time, we fail to realize the value of the person or the moment until it is missing from our life. It is a common thing that happened when the relationship comes into its conclusion. When we break up, it will be very easy to fall into that crappy trap thought. And regret it. Sometimes. But once you are in out there in dating world, sometimes we feel it’s too little too late and we have to learn from our unfortunate decision.

What you should put on your mind that no such things perfect, especially when you expect it perfect only for you. Think of how lucky you are to have someone right beside you, or maybe right in front of you, and to have someone you completely f*cking comfortable around. That should be a best gift, and have to be cherished. Don’t wait for the time when you’ve lost it to finally realized and see how much you take it for granted.

Too many times, people missed the golden moment to find the right person because he/she is too busy looking around for someone better instead of seeing what is ‘ready’ right in front their face. Most of the time, people fall into a trap called ‘The grass is always greener in the other side.”. People always want something more, something better, something perfect, but less to see the mirror that reflect them IS NOT a perfect either.

Happiness comes to those you cherish it, fight for it, and appreciate it, and it never comes to those you fail to appreciate it. Happiness is not the result, but the key.

In fact, we ALWAYS know what we have. We just never think we’d lose it.

- N e e -

Random thought

Well, 

Some says, there may be a time when a committed relationship just doesn’t fit into our puzzle. Or maybe we have some bad experience in having wrong relationships, or maybe have a passionate, mind blowing, teenager love, and all the dramatic breakups that went with it. It seemed that relationship was ignited by instability, lieying, infatuation, irritating moments, heartbreaking. It was rocky and awful - went us into deep sadness, stresses, loneliness, and even in one moment can make us thinking about not having another relationship anymore.

And then we choose to be anonymous from everyone, choose to live our own life in our way. Or maybe being single will be the best choice (for this moment), you might have an open relationship with your partner, hang out with your friends, pursue your career, focusing on your hobby, live your life like there is no tomorrow. Even crazier, you move to other place that no one can find you, start a new life, built your own network, making new friends.

In order to reach your dream or maybe your purpose of life, maybe not everyone in your circle will stay behind your back.

All you can do is being your self, and live the story that no one else can live, the story if your own unique life.

Because, haters gonna hate, liars gonna lie, fakers gonna fake, and gossip will always be a gossip.

We live in our life, not theirs.

And we cannot pleased everyone by telling them one by one what exactly we are thinking about. Everyone has their own way to be happy.

Just be unique, be confident, and most of all, be happy.

But, sometimes, and in fact, you may be feeling lonely and in need of someone to hangout, kiss, and fool around with but can’t be bothered by the stress of a relationship.

And the other facts, guys have a natural git (and curse) of being detached from their emotions. They have no problem sweet talking to a woman, taking her on a date. In the other hand, woman tends to be more emotional and cautious of feeling being 'used'. 

Maybe, we can soar to the world that we will not fall in love with our guy best friend or our casual partner.

But...

We don't pick to be fell in love with..................

- N e e -